Initiation is a signpost showing you the way, a turning point in your life. It can be anything that happens to you and changes your life.
Initiation may be spontaneous or brought about by a ritual. In the first case, you give events meaning yourself. In the second, meaning is given to you during the ritual.
Every act of initiation is, in essence, an awareness of crucial moments. But is every initiation genuine?
Very often people cover themselves in regalia, yet remain nothing more than empty talkers. Quite often the “great ones” are not who they claim to be.
You need to understand that initiation is your personal state. There is no point in proving your level to anyone. What’s more, after passing through Tiphareth you will no longer feel like proving anything.
One very important stage for me was the realisation of Geburah. I have a piece of shrapnel from a mine that could have killed me. But it inspires strength in me. Not the neurotic kind of strength favoured by adolescent Satanists, but a state of understanding Severity and Strength in their purest expression. That initiation means more to me than hundreds of thousands of rituals.
Another important point: you can pass through the Tree of Sephiroth in a single day. But sometimes even a lifetime is not enough to comprehend it.
The Tree of Sephiroth is only one of many possible models. I prefer its clear structure to, say, the shamanic worlds.
What matters in initiation is being able to see the world before and after the experience. If your eyes have been opened, the initiation has truly taken place. If not, there is still work to do.
Initiation is your path. No one will walk it for you. Mindlessly laying hands on someone, as in commercial, cannibalistic Reiki, will give you nothing either.
No one taught me mesmerism. I began practising it only when I came to understand it, although I had known the theory since I was about twenty. The same goes for the “open channels” in my hands. They were “opened” for me long ago, but I only learned to put meaning into them much later.
Initiation is a path. So ask yourself whether you really want to pursue it at all. Magic is not some external energy. It is the inner fire of your own transformation.